The Lemon Life | online magazine offering a fresh perspective on post-grad life.

Words by: Ryan Johnston

Image by: George E. Norkus

I am sitting here watching the leafs in their first pre-season game of what i hope is at least slightly more than an abysmal campaign this coming year.  I am praying to the hockey gods that they give them a little help this time around.

Witnessing something like this made me realize the utter importance of the word.  Help, it is something we would all like to have at times, but are always too afraid to ask.  Why?  Maybe it’s because we feel too proud, we want to accomplish things on our own and asking for help would be the equivalent of giving up.  Maybe we fear that it is a sign of weakness and vulnerability that we don’t necessarily want to evoke on ourselves.  There are several reasons that generate this fear.

The working world today is extremely competitive and can be terrifying if you let it .  I have found that most successful people today are extremely motivated, very intelligent and the thought of asking someone for help is far from their minds.  This generates a fear in young people that seeking out help is a sign that you are weak and will not make it.  You need to accomplish things on your own, take charge and make things happen.  That is all well and good, but no matter what, I believe there comes a time when everyone needs a little help, regardless of the task at hand.

The truth is, people love to help other people.  It gives them a sense of satisfaction to know that they made someone’s life a little easier.  We get so caught up in the fears that come with asking this question that we don’t realize the joy that most people would receive from lending that helping hand.

Everyone experiences similar fears when they are trying to break into the working world.  I worry that I don’t have any real skills, that I am just “spinning my wheels” but not really going anywhere.  I worry that I won’t find my place and will end up working a job that I hate but it pays the bills so obviously it is necessary.  I think about how every decision I make affects the way I live my life.  It is foolish to think that anyone can make it through something like this without any help at all.

What I do have,  that allows me to calm these fears, are great mentors.  Mentors are there to help.  That is what they thrive on.  As scary as this world can be there is always someone who is wiser and has been exactly where you are.  Their advice is invaluable and will help you through the toughest of times.  Don’t ever be afraid to ask someone you admire and respect for help.  If they are the right person, they will jump at the chance to impart some wisdom and allow you to benefit from what they have experienced.

Even at a young age I have had the privilege of learning priceless lessons from those I admire.  So, don’t be afraid to ask.  The opinions of the world do not matter, the importance of asking for help outweighs all of it.  There is only one thing to remember, pay it forward.  Mentors can teach you many things, if you ask the right questions, all you have to do is learn from their advice and hopefully pass it on when someone comes around, years down the road, asking that same question.

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